“If I can do it…”

That ever-inspiring statement has become so cliche and commonplace that we pay little attention. We go on, having not been moved at all.

Sometimes, though, we’re sent links to sites like Life Without Limbs, and read the story of Nick Vujicic, who strives to inspire everyone and anyone. From convincing teenage outcasts that they’re worthy of love, that they are beautiful, to inspiring prisoners to make a commitment to change their lives, it’s difficult to listen to him speak without shedding a few tears.

Last month I found myself sitting in the front row, in a crowded auditorium (just feet away from Tom Berenger, by the way), crying. My husband – the first blind feature film director – was accepting the Achievement in Cinema award at the Gasparilla International Film Festival.

I shed not tears of joy (despite the fact that it was the proudest I’ve been), but rather those of self-reflection. You see, he didn’t know he had to speak, and when he let me in on the news, we didn’t discuss it at all. I had no clue what he was going to say.

My husband never ceases to amaze me. He consistently breaks the perceived mold of those who cannot see. He gets a lot of, “Oh, I’m so sorry” and “your wife really loves you.” Yes, I’m serious. Last week a woman told me that I’m a saint for “taking such good care of him”. Little do they know…

This Friday I want to share my husband’s speech, which has thus far been circulating mostly on self-help and therapy web sites. I share it not so much because he’s the man working in an office just 30 feet from mine, but because of his message.

I’ve always known my husband is a man who intends to live his life without limits. But, like that traditional, “If I can do it…” quote, I’m just used to him pushing the envelope – so much that these words were simply never expected.

Please do let me know what you think.

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2011/04/22.
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Last summer I received notice that my Sunpass (electronic toll-paying device) failed to record a transaction. The notice demanded I send $5.00 to my county toll enforcement office. I did as instructed and moved on.

In January I was stopped in a city 130 miles away, and was advised I was driving with a suspended license. At first I thought someone made a mistake. I hadn’t traveled that far South in more than two years. Was there an imposter? Or perhaps a data entry error? Unfortunately not.

It turns out my local county never received my toll payment and thus suspended my license. I’d been driving illegally for some time. More surprising, though, is that I received no warnings or post-suspension notices from the state, which, I’m told, is standard. To say I was shocked would be an understatement, but what is there to do but take time away from work to sort it all out?

The ticketing officer was understanding and allowed me to drive home.

The next day I called the local toll enforcement officer, and, after several hours of phone calls and emails, we found the problem. The Sunpass device had failed on that one occasion and the system’s backup of tagging tolls based on the license plate failed as well. My check was never cashed (a reminder to myself to balance the personal books more than twice a year).

Days later the suspension was erased. It was as if it never happened and I could breathe again…

Until last month…

I went online to renew my driver’s license and was greeted with an alarming notice… My drivers license was about to be suspended again for failure to plead on the traffic stop ticket. I was under the impression (based on conversations with officials) that the reversal of the original suspension negated the traffic ticket, but, silly me, I didn’t confirm this via checking my own “criminal” record.

After several more phone calls, a plan for “salvation” was devised. I paid $10 for a 3-year driver history report (it was totally clean, save for the outstanding ticket), paid a $23 fine for filing a late plea, and pled not guilty. With my check I included a letter to the judge, requesting either dismissal or a hearing by phone. Driving 300 miles (round trip) and taking 7-8 hours out of my day is far from ideal. Seeing as the initial infraction was reversed, I thought I had a good shot at the judge simply making it all go away.

Wrong. While it would have been less expensive (under $200) and less time consuming (I can take a driver’s course online) to plead guilty and move on, there’s something I just can’t shake… that black cloud that seems to enjoy lingering over my head. Call it negativity, despite the fact I consistently remain positive, but deep down I just know that a guilty plea will somehow backfire on me down the road in some arcane way.

So, later this month I’ll log the miles on my trusty Saturn and stand before the judge, hoping he sees it the way I do. If the suspension, legally, never really existed, am I still guilty for what happened on that late night miles from home?

We’ll see…

Until then, I’ll continue my self-tracking across the Internet, which includes bookmarks on my own name at local government sites. After all, I never received a notice in the mail about the second suspension either. Had I not attempted to renew my license a month early, I wouldn’t have had the time to file the necessary paperwork to ensure I could still drive until the hearing. If my license wasn’t up for renewal this year, who knows how long I would have gotten away driving without a valid license.

Lesson learned. Instead of just “googling” myself to see what’s being said, I now–quite religiously–click three bookmarks every week. They are links to my name search at the city, county and state level. Just to see if I’m due to spend a night in jail.

UPDATE: My license is now blemish-free. After traveling 3 hours (each way) I spent all but 30 seconds in front of the judge. She asked only, “How are you today?” Then said… “Dismissed, see the clerk.”

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2011/04/16.
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Each year I spend countless hours in the kitchen baking cookies, pies, and just about anything else that requires setting the oven at 400 degrees or less. But it’s not just about making my family fatter (trust me, the taste-testing of each batch is enough to do that). It’s about giving back. Yes, we donate monetarily to various organizations – even as gifts to some of our relatives – but, for this house, we bake in hopes to give those less fortunate a momentary escape from store and restaurant leftovers and other food most of us wouldn’t dare eat.

The professional stand mixer is put to good use during holiday baking.

It started 7 years ago, when my sister-in-law asked if I’d bake 10-12 dozen cookies for some of the inmates she was counseling at a local jail. She has, through her church, participated in an outreach program for the better part of a decade. While I toyed with the idea of “rewarding” those incarcerated, I realized that her groups efforts were to expand on the message that these people had hope for rehabilitation and that there were people out here who believed they could make things right and would give them a second chance.

Then Joe and I thought, “Well, why couldn’t we bring some home-baked goodness to those who are struggling just to survive?” With the help of my father-in-law, we found a rescue mission where the occupants worked the grounds and strove to gain additional education so they could get back on their feet. The people here aren’t without sustenance – but they are, for the most part, without goods made especially for them. Their sweets are most often leftovers from local grocery stores – cookies and cakes that are picked up upon their expiration.

Our thought was that we could do something to give them a little taste of home-baked goodness, which they’d probably enjoyed at an earlier time.

Today, that effort has grown into a hundred plus hours of mixing, rolling, cutting, baking and decorating holiday cookies. Last year we delivered nearly 2,000 cookies and this year I’m shooting even higher.

What started as a favor has grown into a tradition rather quickly. Cookies have been, for years, a prime gift for my family. I take “orders” in November and in December pack 5- and 10-lb boxes and send them off via FedEx. With the donation cookies, though, even family has gotten involved. From contributing toward the cost to actually helping “drop” the dough onto pans (it’s my nephews’ way of pitching in) to helping deliver the goods, the event which initially took an afternoon has turned into something much, much bigger.

So, with the deep freezer on and the first pounds of butter ready to be mixed with sugar, I dive back into cookie madness!

This year I’ll be posting updates along the way, so feel free to read and respond. But, if you’re getting that urge to do something in this tight economy, well, nearly every city has a shelter or area where the homeless simply… live. When it comes to doing something for those less fortunate, it’s not all about the money. For many, just knowing someone out there cares enough to take the time to make them something special can play a huge part in getting them through one of the most difficult times of the year.

Too keep up with the baking madness, follow the tag holiday-cookies.

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/11/08.
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There are more than 4,200 bloggers writing about water today as part of Blog Action Day 2010, many of whom are bringing attention to the filth other countries find in their drinking water, and how there’s a dire need abroad for clean, potable water. I have opted to take a different approach, by writing about what’s close to my heart (and often on my mind) when it comes to the most basic of necessities.

Blog Action Day is an annual event held every October 15 which unites the world’s bloggers in posting about the same issue on the same day with the aim of sparking a global discussion and driving collective action.

Living in Hurricane Alley there’s a ritual we follow each and every year. Stock a toiletries bag, double-check the first aid kit, have a few changes of clothes and other necessities packed in the event of an evacuation order. Have on hand some decent canned goods, and, most important, have a sufficient supply of drinking water. Unfortunately, many people choose to ignore the warning signs, and, when a storm hits, within hours they’re gathered by the thousands, lined up and waiting for aid trucks to deliver ice and water.

How much water do Americans waste each day? The number of gallons varies by report, with the minimum being 25 gallons. We can always use less. Challenge yourself.

We had more than a week’s notice that Hurricane Katrina would likely affect South Florida – more than enough notice to stock the pantry and fill the jugs. Yet, as soon as the winds subsided, hundreds were calling local radio stations asking, “Where are the relief trucks? Where’s our water? Where’s our ice?” It was amazing how many had disregarded the warnings and advisories, only to wind up standing in line at gas pumps for 8+ hours, desperate to crank up generators so their kids could watch TV. This was in Miami, a city accustomed to the threat and reality of hurricanes making landfall. Yet, what we experienced was nothing compared to other areas.

All those warnings, and, following the storm, six days without power (again, nothing compared to others). My family stood in line not once. We didn’t have to boil water, run a generator (we don’t even have one), or hang out in grocery store parking lots demanding they open their doors. We were prepared.

When the earthquake hit Haiti, I couldn’t help but think back to that uncomfortable, yet not dire, week we spent in Miami. After all, Haiti had no warning, and on a good day, a minimal supply of “clean” water.

When devastation hits others, we’re quick to react with our wallets. We are, after all, a very giving society. But it’s the big picture we’re missing – that, with just a little planning, devastation doesn’t have to be so… devastating.

In America we’ve not experienced long-term neglect when it comes to this precious resource. When tragedy hits, we have it trucked in. Easy, right? We do this without thought of how much water and oil (yes, oil) is wasted to manufacture all those bottles, build and operate all those trucks and thus produce a “drinkable” supply when we already had one before floods and storms hit.

We waste water like there’s no end to it – letting it run for minutes to heat up our showers, flushing after even the lightest of tinkles, and, worst of all, letting all the excess go right down the drain.

In Florida, my husband and I are on a well system. There’s been lots of concern, debate, and even arguments, about the potential of the wells going dry. For the powers-that-be, the fix for this is to carry out initial plans to construct water treatment plants, despite the fact our population is less than half of what was expected prior to the economic downturn and housing market crash. One argument for the city system is that when power goes out, so does the well pump, leaving consumers using – gulp – pool water to flush their toilets. This, somehow, is viewed as a big issue?

A $20 stainless steel bottle will save you tons of money, conserve water & help the environment.

The problem starts right at home, with us. Preparation for disaster isn’t enough. We need to pay attention to our wastefulness every day. The good news is, conserving water and leaving a smaller carbon footprint isnt difficult at all.

From composting to filtering water at home and using stainless steel bottles, there’s a lot of green (that’s nature and bucks) to be saved. Believe me, filtering tap water, making your own soda (I have a SodaStream) and replacing chemicals with natural ingredients (like vinegar and baking soda), isn’t an inconvenience. When you consider how much is wasted in the processing of packaging and “ready to eat” goods, it just makes sense. Having extra on hand in case of unforseen emergencies – as well as preparing for known urgencies – does even more. It saves you a great deal of headache and worry.

Once you’ve found your groove – that is, once you’ve ditched all those cheap, plastic bottles and unnecessary packages of things that just aren’t good for you – count up your savings. Then, take a portion of it and give to a worthy charity, one that’s helping to bring clean water to those who need it the most. Because, for most of America, the resources are already there – we just have to start respecting them.

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/10/15.
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Here’s 10 things people do that make me wonder if we need to require common sense & respect classes in our schools. After all, we learn by example:

1. Shopping carts on the loose. Seriously, how difficult is it to walk 20 feet to secure a cart between bars? No drop-off points? I’m gonna bet the majority of people could use the exercise. It’s called respect for other people’s property. Learn it, and reap the benefits (a blemish-free vehicle).
2. Headphone-less YouTube watching. I’m amazed that watching online videos sans headphones in restaurants and coffee shops is considered acceptable by the people who commit this disrespectful act. Even worse? Personal, heated conversations conducted via speakerphone.
3. Leaving the mess behind. I don’t care if it’s in a movie theatre or on a park bench. If you make a mess, clean it up. It’s that simple. Lately people have been leaving plates on tables outside of Starbucks. They attract ants, and make it so the next customer has nowhere to sit.
4. The bathroom. I hate to even say it (and I shouldn’t have to). Ladies, if you’re not going to sit, lift the seat…and flush.
5. Screaming at your kid. If you can’t control your temper, get help. If you think the embarrassment of screaming at your child in public works, you’re wrong. Save the kid some undue trauma, and the rest of us some headache, by simply stepping to the side. And if it’s the other way around? If you’re child’s having a fit, step outside.
6. Talking TO me instead of WITH me. First, learn the proper way to initiate a conversation. If you call me on the phone and say, “I want to talk to you,” it has a negative affect. Second, the best way to gain anyone’s respect is to talk… and listen… and that is talking WITH someone.
7. Presenting selfish actions or statements as fact, or representative of the majority. I understand you may or may not like a certain movie or the way I recycle or run my business, but you can’t argue your personal thoughts as fact and you probably don’t represent everyone else. An opinion is just that. Present it that way, and I’ll respect your method of communicating it.
8. Guaranteeing something you cannot guarantee. I have a rule of thumb with my clients – and they know it… I cannot guarantee that certain actions will garner them the same results as another company. It’s a smart statement because guarantees not only cost me money, it increases their frustration when things don’t turn out as planned. So, all you service providers, especially SEO gurus, stop telling me, or clients, that results are guaranteed. Business owners want the people they hire to be original and have a clear understanding of the company’s goals. They’d rather invest in a project that has a decent chance of success, than to spend less and waste months of time.
9. Tunnel vision. In both my personal and professional life, tunnel vision just irks me. When you grow irritated with my husband (who is blind) because he doesn’t know you’re talking to him, it’s clear you’re not using eye contact – if you did, you’d realize he needs more than just a distant voice to direct him into a conversation. When you refuse to hear others’ ideas because you see every “path” as a one-way, straight road, you’re crippling your business. Tunnel vision is a turn-off.
10. Dismissing how others perceive what you say. You may have meant well, but it’s all about perception. What we say has different meanings to different people. By adjusting your comments (or attitude) for each person you speak with you can save yourself a good many headaches

So, what drives you crazy? Grocery store lines? Busy signals? Phone prompts? How can we all learn from each other and grow?

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/10/02.
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The movie is nearly complete and ready for distribution. But, he needs your help. Please visit the Kickstarter Page for The Bunker and share the links via Facebook and Twitter, or any other social networks to which you’re subscribed. Lots of great folked have already pledged and share the news, but there’s just six days left (as of the date of this post) to reach the goal.

The project ends September 30, 2010.

Here are just a few articles, news and interviews about the project. And, thanks in advance for your help in spreading the word!

What If There Was No Marketing? (bkmacdaddy)

In this must-read article, Brian explains how marketing is a vital part of sharing worthy things across social media platforms. He then promotes the project.

Visions of a Blind Film Director (parmfarm)

Award-winning journalist Amy Parmenter conducted an interview with Joe and you can hear the full audio.

Kickstarting a Dream (webOSroundup)

The webOS community site supports the project – in fact, they’re backing it based on the number of pledges and shares across social media.

Blind Guy Raises Dough to Finish Horror Flick (WIRED.COM)

Blind Man Makes Movie (CBS/WINK)

Watch the newsclip…

REALLY BUSY? Here are some Tweets you can simply copy & paste:

Make this happen! #Blind #Latino Director’s Feature Film: http://bit.ly/cW7erh Pls RT!

The most unique film project ever? Help get it released! http://bit.ly/cW7erh

Impossible is an opinion, not a fact. #Blind #Latino filmmaker proves it: http://bit.ly/cW7erh

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/09/24.
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After my blind husband, Joe, reached out via Kickstarter to help raise completion funds for his first feature film, we were faced with a number of negative comments. Earlier this month I talked about someone who said Joe needed to stop chasing the abilities he’s lost, and do something else. My post was written to hopefully bring awareness to the millions of blind people who are perfectly capable of carrying out unique and admirable tasks.

Naysayers aren’t anything new to Joe – he’s been busting through hurdles and proving doubters wrong ever since he began working on The Bunker nearly five years ago. On Friday, though,, things took an unexpected turn when I was accused of being Joe’s surrogate. You read that right -  a question’s been raised over me having supposedly directed the film, passing credit off to my husband, ostensibly  for the sake of him getting 15 minutes of fame.

Unlike other party poopers, who claim Joe’s simply not capable of carving out a career in filmmaking – this guy decided to instead accuse both Joe and I of outright fraud. His post is filled with utter ignorance and disdain, going so far as to say that even having Joe on set is a health and safety risk for the cast and crew, rendering any production uninsurable.

To guys like this, I can only offer proof via video. I wasn’t surprised to find out the so-called fellow filmmaker had not read one single interview or article, nor had he watched any of the clips from the Making of… documentary which show Joe at work, directing his cast and instructing his crew.

While people like this spend their days labeling those with unique challenges as either unqualified or incapable, I choose to label them as simply uneducated. Such naysayers, who spew nothing but doubt and dismissive comments – in an arrogant, accusatory way – have clearly missed out on some key life lessons. Such as:

• Educating himself about the project being discussed. Had the poster spent a single minute going to any of the sites linked in the forum, he’d have found not only video evidence of what Joe’s done, but seen that Joe’s been sharing his filmmaking experience with the online world via his blog since day one. Seriously, why would he (or we, in this case) spend five years hyping up a hoax, to then hit Kickstarter with a goal of $5,000? I say if you’re trying to cash in, go big.

• Having some semblance of knowledge about the blind. This hits a nerve with me because there are so many stories about sports-playing amputees, deaf actors and paralyzed mothers, which are all easy to believe. Yet, similar stories concerning the achievements of the blind scream ‘impossible’.

• Professional tact. This accusation was posted in a group devoted to industry pros – not some Yahoo group riddled with trolls. The fact that he chose such a venue to, well, act like a buffoon? Shows him to be just that.

Adding insult to injury, he closes with a rather startling and abhorrent statement… That my argument that “anyone can do anything they put their mind to” doesn’t stand up to scrutiny. Perhaps he’s experienced many failures in life. Perhaps he’s concerned that a blind director might possibly steal some of his own thunder. Or, perhaps he’s just so arrogant that he thinks unless someone is born “perfect” they’ve no shot at attaining their goals. I couldn’t tell you which – heck, maybe it’s all three – but I will say this: It’s people like this guy that make society appear pathetic. It’s people like him that crush people’s spirits, making them believe they’ll never be recognized for what they strive to accomplish…

Save for the strong and determined – both of which describe my husband. While very below the belt and shocking, Friday’s rant didn’t make Joe hesitate for a moment. He rebutted the post with politeness and facts. After which, he did what he always does when confronted with an ignorant naysayer. He moved forward, because something much bigger is at stake, and within a hair’s breadth of being realized.

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/09/19.
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I’m talking about guys like Nick Vujicic, who’s self-portrait video has garnered more than a million hits on YouTube. The series, titled “No Arms, No Legs, No Worries” tells the story of a man who refuses to let the hand he was dealt stop him from inspiring others to quit complaining and realize we’re all beautiful.

I’ve known many disabled people who have consistently proven they really have no disabilities at all, but simply a different way of doing things. Our recent quest (via Kickstarter) to raise funds so my blind husband’s movie – an independent thriller – could be completed in post, caused the cycle of disbelief to start all over again.

"Blindness may take your sight, but it cannot steal your vision." - Joseph M. Monks, Blind Film Director

When I’m met with naysaying about Joe’s own efforts to direct a feature film, I’m utterly confused. I’m not talking about comments like, “Wow, I can’t imagine how he did that!”, but rather advice that he should stop trying to chase the abilities he’s lost, and move onto something else.

No, I’m not stretching the truth here. And it makes me wonder why it’s so unbelievable that he could have written a movie script, built the set and directed from start to finish.

I share with you the following – a video that spotlights Joe himself. Here, you’ll see that he used power tools to build the set and worked directly with the cameraman to get the shots he wanted. A little swordfighting is thrown in (not staged, either – he’s actually dueling a seasoned competitor in a packed room) just for kicks, as well as testimony by some of the actors.

So, give it a watch, then tell me… is it really impossible for the blind to accomplish the same things as the sighted? Why are stories of people in wheelchairs playing basketball extraordinary, but the blind working in a “visual” field perceived as an impossibility?

<<HELP THE PROJECT – ENDS SEPT. 30, 2010>>

As Joe says, “Blindness may take your sight, but it cannot steal your vision”.

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/09/06.
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Okay, so I like Starbucks, and most of my offerings here are for coffee because, simply put, not everyone needs discounts on my services and just about anyone likes coffee, tea or Frappuccinos. I realize that not everyone who reads this blog is running an online store or needs help creating a strategic campaign. So, coffee it is…

How it works:

1. Visit the Kickstarter Project Page: Blind Director’s Feature Film: The Bunker.
2. Pledge any amount (starts at $1.00).
3. Post (in the comments below) your Kickstarter display name (so I can verify).

It’s that simple. You’ll be helping someone realize a pretty big dream. The movie is already completed in core filming and editing (which was an expensive in-house process).

On August 31, I’ll use some fancy algorithm – okay, I’ll have my nephews pick the name out of a hat – and that lucky winner will win. And, yes, if you despise java and the likes, I will substitute for any establishment either locally or offering such cards for order on the Internet. As a bonus, two more lucky winners will get a copy of my husband’s book, Stuff Out’a My Head, autographed (and personalized if you so desire).

Questions? Ask away.

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/08/13.
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You know those people who don’t see value in a product or service, don’t want to hear about how it works, and, at the same time, vent frustration over their lack of success at a specific task? Yeah, you know who I’m talking about… Naysayers!

My husband, Joe, had a similar outlook when it came to social media. Joe was blind (pun intended) to the potential benefits of harnessing social media as a business tool. True, he used Twitter and had someone posting his blogs to Facebook and the like, but he simply couldn’t be convinced that these were actually tools to be used in the quest to make more people aware of his first feature film.

Just five days into the social media and PR campaign to push for the completion of his film, blind director Joe Monks was spotlighted during two segments on CBS affiliate WINK News.

In April 2010 Joe posted on his blog that he wasn’t going to get caught up in the “same irrational exuberance…that brought down many of the dot com startups way back when”. His post was a humorous rant about Foursquare, Twitter, Facebook, et al, in which he went on to explain how our dog has layed claim to mayorship of a favorite patch of trees for her own, er, business. It’s a funny read, but it also highlighted his reluctance to recognize the purpose of businesses and individuals using social media to promote themselves, their products and their businesses.

The past week has changed his mind. Imagine my surprise when my husband uttered the words so many women wait a lifetime to hear: “I was wrong.”

What caused Joe to do a 180 regarding social media? What made him recognize that there are tens of millions of people out there wanting to experience something cool and share it with others?

On August 2nd, Sight Unseen Pictures launched a Kickstarter project to fund the completion of the first feature film directed by a blind filmmaker. Over the years, an incredible amount of effort and passion had been poured into this movie, and, with a distribution offer ready to be considered, some finishing touches (post production) had to be completed. So we set out to raise a minimum of $5,000 so Joe’s film could finally reach audiences. While the Kickstarter project is still in its infancy, press releases and social media sharing has prompted people to take notice. The phones started ringing and emails poured in. Just this past Saturday he appeared on WINK News (CBS) in Southwest Florida, and several other interviews are scheduled.

Joe’s realized that the days of bulk faxing and spending 8 hours a day on the phone are behind us. Now, with a few clicks, news about anything can reach the masses in a short period of time. Reaching the ultimate goal – getting higher ups on the chain to take notice – is still a feat, but there’s power in numbers (Justin Bieber’s success on YouTube proves this).

So if you’ve been putting off social media campaigns to get more people engaged in what you do, just look at Joe, who’s come to understand that having thousands of people talking about you speaks volumes. Eventually you need to take into account that the millions of people using social media outlets to interact about – well, everything – are often the best spokespeople for your product.

© Pamela Hazelton, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Originally published on 2010/08/08.
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